When I woke up this morning, I had no idea where my thoughts would take me.

Yesterday was a New Moon and with the craziness we've been through over the course of the last moon cycle, I thought it was the perfect time to pull cards. As I was shuffling one of my decks to prepare, one of the cards fell to the ground in front of me.

It was Leila.

Her message. simply said “Spend time alone in nature, meditating about your desires and intentions. Ask the angels to help you gain a positive perspective.”

I listened.

I poured myself a cup of coffee and headed out for a walk on the property we’re parked at. When I got to the little grove of trees that hides you from the world, I talked to whomever was listening. I spilled my fears and worries out without being afraid or embarrassed. I cried in a way I haven't allowed myself to cry in years.

For the loss of my best friend and familiar.

For the loss of my own Rory, that really wasn't a loss but a growth of spirit, and a living of life out in the world.

For the loss of people I now realize were put in my life for a purpose, of which I’ve now moved beyond.

When I had cried myself to silence, I finished my now cold coffee and walked back to the bus.

I lit my cedar and sat back down with my cards.

Out of curiosity I opened the book and looked up the extended message for Leila's card. It fits. Like Leila has been here watching, listening, feeling. Knowing exactly what it is I long for at this very moment. I was not surprised at all by what I read.

“Your life has been noisy lately, and you need to escape into a place of natural tranquility. It is time for you to be alone in nature, even if it is just for a brief while. You don't need others’ permission to take care of your soul this way. Simply plan your sojourn, and then follow through with those plans.”

“Once you are alone in nature, allow your mind to wander wherever it wants to go. Notice your thoughts and feelings, perhaps write them down. After a time, speak (aloud or silently) to the nature angels that surround you. Ask them to clear your body and aura of any stress that you may have absorbed. Then, meditate and pray about your desires and intentions. Prayers are amplified by the power of nature, and you will feel very refreshed when you get home.”

Today, I am free.

Today, I let it all go.

Today, the first day after the new moon, is the day new beginnings will make themselves known.

Are you prepared? I’m not sure I am, are we ever? But, I am certainly going to do my best to not hold too tight, so that I can fly free when it is time.