It doesn't matter where you are. As long as you bring love with, you're home.

Our house, lit up for Christmas 2018.

This year I’ve been having a hard time finding that Christmas feeling. I haven’t watched any Christmas movies, I haven’t baked any cookies, no sledding, no decorating, and until today I hadn’t bought any Christmas presents.

Because our house is for sale, and everything in it is brand new - from the flooring to the appliances, we aren’t living there. We haven’t been living there since the end of July. I am lucky enough to have a friend with an empty house who was gracious enough to let us rent from him until our house is sold. I had hoped to be out of here sometime in October. Unfortunately, fall is a slow time of year for house sales, and winter in Minnesota is even slower. And because Divine timing isn’t MY timing, we are still here waiting.

Normally, the house is covered with lights and there are spruce tip containers on the front porch. We usually have two Christmas trees; not because I love decorating them and taking them down…ugh. We have two trees because my parents are getting older and decided that the tree they had was too heavy to bring up from the basement anymore, and we just happened to have the perfect house for two trees. And I have more than enough ornaments to cover them both.

The Christmas tree that was in the living room in the front of the house, had all of the hand-beaded ornaments my Grandma made, old cookie cutters that were hung with the ribbon handles of Anthropologie bags, the Baby’s First Christmas Ornaments, and our the ornament from our first Christmas together.

The Christmas tree that was in the family room in the back of the house held all of the Hallmark ornaments, the Snoopy ornaments, Minnesota Vikings ornaments, and all the fun ornaments the kids made in school.

This year we have all of our Christmas decorations packed away in our shipping container. All of them except for the kids’ stockings and a tiny Christmas tree that has some little bells, poinsettia lights, sheet music ribbon, a random bird, and an unlit star.

This year’s Christmas tree. Complete with random bird and star that does not light up.

It’s been a challenge and a major learning experience in mindfulness this December; trying to find the positive in what appeared to be negative. Somehow I think I have found it. Whether it came in with the piles of fabric I finally sorted and was inspired by to create Christmas presents, or the order of two aprons from my sister in Tennessee, I’m not certain. It could have been the time spent at my old place of business while I was helping out with some holiday classes. Spending hours surrounded by old friends and people decorating spruce tips and wreaths while Christmas music played all around could have done it. Or, maybe it was the shift in thinking that came along with doing Yoga with Adriene’s 30 Day Dedicate series again (I am currently on day 28).

Whatever it was, I am glad for it. I am finally appreciating the sight that is lighted homes around the neighborhood and the Christmas music playing on the radio.

I’m even enjoying having my front window blocked by a life-size cutout of Stephen Colbert from his Mr. Goodwrench days, that Andy has had packed away in the garage since he used it to scare the bejesus out of me years ago. Actually, having my front window blocked is not really a hardship, since I cannot stand that the window is uncovered in the first place. Silly me doesn’t like that anyone walking by can just look right in any time of day, and I am too cheap to buy a huge shade for the window of a house I hope to be out of soon. Stephen is just life-like enough that I am hoping a side effect of having him in the window will be that anyone walking by will see him and look away thinking they’ve seen a real person standing in the window. Oops. Here come my anti-social tendencies. We definitely need to get out of here before I go complete recluse and just buy some black paint for the windows. Sheesh.

I will leave you with that wonderful image, and the following message in your mind: It doesn’t matter where you are. As long as you bring love with, you’re home. It is something I have been reminding myself throughout this entire home remodel/sale process. I may not be at “home” for Christmas this year, but I am definitely at home because I have Andy and Connor with me, and Alyson close by. I have what is important, even when my mind tells me something is missing. My heart is here. My love is here. My family is with me and THAT is what is really and truly important.

You may need to remind me of that when we finally buy our bus and start the building process. I have a feeling that it’s something I may need to hear again.