Life. With Friends.

As a woman I know it can be hard to open up to other women, because we can be so damn judgemental. It can be daunting to approach someone or comment on their instagram post unless they are someone you know well, because not everyone is a kind person and not everyone has the best of intentions.

There are a couple of women on Instagram that I have followed, and mutually been followed by, and I've found myself reaching out and interacting with them more and more over the last couple years.

Now, I find myself looking forward to their posts and replies in a way I do not look forward to stepping outside of the bus and meeting all the people coming through the revolving door that is this campground we’re staying at.

Maybe that's why, at 40, it feels weird to say this next bit.

I have a new…ish friend.

In fact, I have a few newish friends, but today there is one particular friend on my mind.

It isn't every day that you connect with someone new to you and realize you wish you'd known them your whole life.

I first connected with her last year.

(Just another of the reasons why I can never be apologetic that 2020 was a good year for our family.)

We have incredibly personal conversations, we have funny conversations, we vent, we complain, we cry and grieve, we support and encourage. We laugh at the same things and both have a fascination with all things rocks and plants.

She makes the most amazing food and teaches her kids to be wonderful humans. She homeschools them, takes them adventuring, shows them how to feel things, how to find peace and joy in the mundane. She is there for them in their struggles, in their grief, in their fun, in their fear, even as she deals with her own.

She is a brilliant orange and pink sunrise in a world of gray clouds. The first bud to burst open on a weeping willow, the first bloom to feed the pollinators in a field full of wildflowers. Her spirit lights up the way for many, even those who try to dim her light. She heals, she helps, she gives, she loves.

She doesn't realize her reach, the mark she leaves on people. She doesn't realize that she can brighten the darkest aura and bring light to corners long thought lost to the dark.

The funny thing about this friend of mine, this wonderful woman who has infiltrated life in the best possible way…

The funny thing is, we have never laid eyes on each other in real life.

This friend of mine went to high school with Andy. She had commented on a few of his instagram posts about me and the bus, and I felt like I absolutely needed to reach out to this woman, who had never met me, but truly felt like a long lost friend.

I am so glad that I did.

Today is her birthday, and while I cannot be there to give her a hug and tell her in person, I can tell her Happy Birthday over the interwebs and send her all the love the wind can carry.

One day I will pull her in close and we'll cry and laugh and hug like we've been friends forever.

One day..

I can't wait for that day.